Tuesday, June 14, 2005


I’m allowed one guest to my free dinner in Upstate New York so I call Chris Monaco. He’s my first choice because he has a car. It was the deciding factor. I figured we’d go up, take our nice sweet time and make a day of it. But alas, turns out he’s working. He suggests my second choice, Kerry. She would have been my first choice but then the whole car thing got in my head. I figure we'd take a train up and non-sexually canoodle on the way back. It's a win-win. In any case, we talk today after a personally disastrous shift at her restaurant. Kerry has always wanted to be in the restaurant business since she was in junior high. She has an Ivy League degree to prove it. She’s dedicated to the business in a way that I could never be. It’s what consumes her and that’s how she likes it. And I’m not that way. She could never fully grasp how much I admire her. But she’s a back server right now and while her love for the industry is still alive and well, her patience for her current restaurant is not. She should have a management job. And as I hear her retell me her issues with tonight’s service, two things hit me. One, that I don’t want the job at my dream restaurant because it would mean giving up my true passion (filmmaking) and two, I know who should have the job I’ll be turning down.
“I hope you get this job, Bernard.”
“Actually you should have it.”
“They want you.”
“Right now they want me because they haven’t met you.”
“You’re kidding me right?”
“No, I’m not. I want your resume. I’m giving it to Pam (the current Wine Director).”
“I won’t even interview until you turn it down.”
“As of this moment I’ve pulled my name from consideration.”
And that’s it. It took an incredible moment of clarity, when all of it came together for me. She’s the one. I could have let the situation get messy, but now the world has let me have an out. I plan on sleeping really well tonight.


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